Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Nolan Henry: The Day You Were Born

Dear Nolan,

I can't decide if you will want to read my letters. Maybe your wife will!

I knew you would be born on July 22 for several months. All I had to do was hope my c-section wouldn't be rescheduled. It wasn't! I had a hard time towards the end of my pregnancy with you. I was huge and tired, plus had to take care of Riley and Ella. All by myself. It wasn't easy!

On Monday, July 22, your daddy and I had to be at the hospital at 5:30 a.m. We were very excited! Actually, we fussed the whole way to the hospital. I can't even remember what it was about, but it ended once we got to the hospital to get ready for you.

We showed up and waited for things to get going. I was hooked up to monitors for about two hours before the c-section started. An old friend from high school was my nurse and took great care of me. She was also the one to "catch" you. It was nice knowing someone in the operating room.

Finally, around 7:30 my doctor came in and said it wouldn't be long. With Ella I was extremely nervous and ended up having a panic attack on the operating table. I was nervous this time around and had heavy breathing, but it wasn't as bad with you. Things seemed to move faster when I had you. Looking back, I can tell the panic attack with Ella was a prolonged event. Looking back with you, I was so much more calm while in the holding room.

Having an epidural isn't all that great. It's hard to relax knowing a long needle is going in your back. When the needle was inserted in my back, a very sharp pain radiated down to my knee and actually hurt. I yelped as my knee reflex shot forward.

I'm always relieved when your dad walks in the operating room. He has the biggest smile but I can never see it because he's wearing a surgical mask. 

At 8:16 a.m. you came out crying. 

While you were being cleaned up I went to recovery. This is always the hardest part for me! I hate being separated from everyone! There was a clock on a nearby wall and I kept my eyes on that clock. I knew I wouldn't be in recovery for more than an hour, and I was keeping track. When it was finally time for me to leave recovery I was wheeled to our room. No one was there either! I finally asked a nurse to let everyone know I was in my room. It wasn't long before your daddy walked in with you. 

I was happy to see you! You looked like the girls! 

You were by far the most painful delivery. Everyone said that getting my tubes tied would hurt. How true that was! The worst pain of my life!

We had several visitors. I remember April coming in and holding you. Maybe before or after you, Paw-Paw, Aunt-Ma, Riley and Ella came in to see us. My Dad dropped Ella right onto my bed and the first thing she did was lunge for me. Maybe you can imagine the pain! Riley oohed and ahhed over you, and claimed you were the cutest little thing she had ever seen. You were so handsome!

I love you Nolan Henry Smith. It was worth it all to get you here. 

Love, Mama.

Ella Rae : 13-month newsletter

Dear Ella

This month finds you in a brand new role: big sister. When you first came to the hospital you were definitely unsure of the situation. You wanted me to hold you, but less than an hour after a c-section and tubal ligation was a little soon for me to try and wrestle you. You didn't like that! Since then, you've definitely warmed up to Nolan. You love to give him kisses. But the best part for you is when we praise you for being so sweet. You are so sweet! 

And at that time you wanted nothing to do with Nolan. The two nights I spent in the hospital were also the first nights you had spent away from you. You gave Paw-Paw a run for his money! You're very rambunctious and rough. You love to tussle and are still trying to walk. You can take just a few steps but you're still timid.

The physical difference between you and Nolan is astonishing. It's like you grew up overnight. You are very plump and round and soft while Nolan is skinny and little.

You won't talk but you communicate by grunts and whines. Oh the whines!  You're sort of fussy. And you will point to whatever it is that you want. We are left to read your mind, usually incorrectly. 

You had a great birthday party (almost a month late). Lots of friends were here and you got lots of new toys that you love.

You and your daddy are pals. You like to sit with him when he plays the guitar. You love to dance and laugh to his music.

You are a sweet little sister and a loving big sister. You love it when Riley plays with you. You've just started giving Nolan huge wet kisses.

We love you so much Ella Rae. You're my little baby.

Love, mama