You are growing up. Our conversations are even changing. When before, you would just ask random questions in no coherent stream, now you are asking questions that mean something and that explore ideas in depth. As we were driving the other day I noticed that I was enjoying answering your questions, and that was even on the way to work! Normally I would have told you Mama needs quiet time. Sorry.
It's not often that you nap anymore, much less fall asleep beside me. I couldn't resist this picture! You are the kindest, most caring little girl. You put up with so much; from me, from Ella, and now from Nolan, too. You don't complain often, and you help me out more than you know.
The other day as we were driving:
You: I thought camels lived in the desert, not on grass.
Me: (realizing you were talking about the alpaca farm we just passed) Those are alpacas, not camels.
Then when I called to tell your daddy, you really liked that. You love when I tell stories of something funny you've said. You love to be bragged upon. We have a lot to brag about, too.
Recently I heard words come out of your mouth that I've never heard. I was in the other room and heard you say, "Get off of me." Haha, Ella crawls all over you all the time.
April was a tough month for you starting out. On a Thursday when you came into my room after school, you complained that you were cold. I didn't think much of it, but turns out you had a fever that would last for five days. It was non-stop fever and feeling puny for five days. I finally took you to the doctor and you were diagnosed with adeno-virus, also known as the plague of death. Not really, but it was bad. Then I contracted this plague. We lucked out and no one else got sick. This was the sickest you've ever been. I think, even worse than some of your bad asthma attacks.
I love you. I want you to be happy. You are the sweetest little girl in the world. And you are the biggest handful in the world. If Ella isn't happy, no one is happy. I try so hard to make you happy. I try so hard to read your mind and give you what you want. But I constantly feel like I'm letting you down. You rarely seem to be happy. It seems like I never please you. I am trying so hard! And it's because I love you so much! Before I was pregnant with you, I wanted a baby. I wanted you. God gave me you and I'm so very thankful for you. I realize that I have to resolve to try harder, to love you more, and to make you happy. I have to work harder for you than I do with your brother and sister. That's fine, and I can do that.
Last month I did find something that you enjoyed. See, the problem isn't that you hate every activity I offer; most of the time the problem is that you don't want to quit when it's quitting time. When Aunt Ma (you call her Mi-Ma) and I were little, we loved Easter. We would spend countless hours hiding our Easter eggs for each other in the back yard at Grandmom's. Over and over again. Those are some of my best and favorite memories with my sister! We loved hiding and finding Easter eggs. Turns out you and Riley loved hiding and finding Easter eggs.
Haha, and finally, you just started stealing eggs from Riley. We couldn't hide eggs all day long, and you found this unreasonable.
There are times when you prefer Riley over me, especially when your feelings are hurt or you've just gotten into trouble. You lean into her for a hug, wrap your little arms around her back, and pat. Your little pudgy hand just a patting breaks my heart!
We are still fighting a war on pacifiers. I may have already mentioned that you've named them "bobbies." You are known to have a bobby in your mouth and a bobby in each hand. Nolan's bobbies are not safe, even in his mouth. His bobby can be snatched right out of his mouth if you feel the need. "Where'd bobby go?" is your most used phrase.
You also say, "What's that?" Constantly. Any noise you hear, any car or truck in our neighborhood. Any object you've never seen or don't recognize. "What's that?"
You also have by-words that you say all of the time, too. These are 'ow' and 'no.' "Ella, are you having fun?" "No." Most of the time you don't even have time to consider the question before you answer no. It just shoots out of your mouth!
It's going to be tough growing up with two big sisters. They are already abusing you. Riley dresses you up in her glitter hats and Ella snatches bobbies right out of your mouth! You can't eat a meal without Ella demanding a bite of whatever it is that you're eating. You don't like it when you get skipped.
For the most part you are just the happiest little feller there ever was. You love to play with toys, especially any toy in Riley's room. The smaller the toy the better. You're not happy until every toy has been thoroughly gummed and slobbered upon. You like to flap your arms. I think you're trying to wave, but it just looks like you're about to take flight and fly away.
Spending time at Grandmom and Grandad's is something that all three of you love. The toys are new and there are no rules. Nolan has new places to explore, Ella can drink all the Ensures she wants, and Riley can help Grandad. It's just about the best place to ever be!
I need to find out what the story is behind the big sink in the laundry room, mostly known as the 'utility room.' Why did Grandmom want this big sink? Did she ever think that her great-grandchildren would use this sink for a bath tub? Maybe not, but all three of you have been plunged into this sink and scrubbed down.
I can't wait until school is out for the summer. I'm ready to spend some much needed time with my babies. Love you three kiddos more than you'll ever know. I think about all three of you throughout my day.